happy day, dude

i turn 30 in a few weeks. given the failed attempts in the past years at any sort of birthday celebration, i've kind of given up on the whole idea. some people can just pull things together and get people excited and as much as i wish i could do it, i'm just not one of those magnetic people. i haven't told anyone that it's coming up (although my coworkers may find out if they look at my file) and to be honest i just want to get out of town to avoid the depression that it causes. i had plans to go to LA or denver to meet up with a friend, but she's so busy right now she can't even return phone calls or emails to discuss details of the trip. the cost is high too, so i think i'm just not going to go. i should really stop caring altogether. i'm hitting an age where this shit doesn't matter anymore, right?