shame

it's one of those days where you wake up and cringe because you remember what you did the night before. the kind of night where you can't blame the alcohol because you weren't really drinking that much to begin with. the kind of night where everything was off and nothing seemed to go right, where jokes you made failed and just being you displeased one person after another. apologies received with cold silence, smiles disappeared quickly, everyone scattered early because it just wasn't fun anymore. the magic has faded and people know who i really am now.

also, addendum, now that i'm pissed off - people that are competitive dicks about "sports" that aren't actually sports are the worst.

ok, second addendum, pps - a part of growing thicker skin is not caring if you piss people off. as an offshoot of that, it's knowing that this will lead to occasional social isolation and being okay with that.